Special Education Advocacy San Jose

Can You Be Effective and Have Good Working Relationships with the School District?

Part 2 of 2

The answer to the question posed above is “It depends.”  If you live in a combative or even a passively resistant school district, it is more difficult to have good working relationships.  There are instances when a District refuses to negotiate based on your child’s individual needs, or does not partially or fully implement the IEP.  We are currently working with a family whose child’s school refuses to provide required forms documenting what took place at the IEP. Many of our families receive goal drafts with vague baselines, and goals that are difficult to measure.

Women are often conditioned to ‘be nice, work collaboratively’.  When a District does not implement the IEP or show willingness to discuss the parents’ point of view, it can feel exceedingly uncomfortable to say something about it.  In most cases, we recommend polite persistence – in writing.  Rule #1 in special education is “If it is not in writing, it never happened.”  All follow ups need to be written (email is fine), and sent to at least two people at your child’s school. Given a choice of being nice and getting a child what s/he needs, always go for getting your child what s/he needs.

Realize that teachers do not set policy, and have little control over the process.  They are also the ones (along with the therapists) who will be working with your child.  Even when the District is being uncooperative (or worse), I have always worked carefully to maintain good relationships with my child’s teachers.  There are a number of ways to do this, depending on your time and budget.  When my son was put into a great teacher’s (already full) class, she was not pleased about having another student with special needs. I knew I’d been pegged as one of ‘those’ parents.  I sent in Kleenex and other school supplies on her requested list when my budget allowed.  I asked if I could do anything to help. I brought in a holiday decoration for the entire class to enjoy.  When she realized I wanted to have a good working relationship (and that I was not all the things she had heard), we became friends, and remain so to this day.

In conclusion, be nice where you can, firm where you need to be, and work on building and maintaining good relationships wherever and whenever possible.

 

http://www.aspireadvocacy.com

https://www.facebook.com/aspireadvocacy

As parents, we understand,  As advocates, we can help.